Why People Pleasing Is Undermining Your Ability to Lead Your Group Practice

Running a group practice puts you in a position where you’re constantly attuned to how others feel — your clinicians, your admin support, your referral partners, and of course, your clients. That emotional awareness is part of what makes you a strong therapist. But the truth is, it can also make leadership harder than it needs to be — especially when people pleasing starts creeping into the way you make decisions.

This is something I hear from group practice owners all the time:
“I don’t want to upset my team.”
“I feel bad saying no.”
“I’m scared they’ll leave if I don’t agree.”

If you’ve found yourself giving higher splits than you can sustain, adjusting rules so you don’t disappoint someone, or getting pulled into endless special requests (“Can you change the lighting?” “Can I have a different chair?” “Can we order almond milk instead?”)… you’re not alone. People pleasing shows up quickly and quietly in group practice leadership. And over time, it can seriously hold back your confidence, your profitability, and the stability of your practice.

Let’s dig into why this happens, what it costs you, and how you can shift into a more grounded, steady leadership approach — one that values your time, your energy, and your role as CEO.

Why Group Practice Owners Fall Into People Pleasing

One of the biggest reasons this pattern shows up is that many therapists-turned-owners still struggle to see themselves as leaders. You may have built a thriving practice, supported your team in growing their caseloads, taken risks, and created solid systems — but you might still underestimate the expertise you actually bring to the table. When you compare your practice to long-established ones or owners who’ve been doing this for years, it’s easy to slip into the mindset of, “Who am I to charge more?” or “I shouldn’t take up too much space.”

When your confidence wavers, people pleasing fills the gap.

Another major factor is conflict avoidance. Therapists are incredibly skilled at creating harmony and supporting emotional regulation — but those strengths sometimes make it harder to initiate conversations that feel even slightly uncomfortable. Instead of setting a boundary or giving direction, you might hold the anxiety yourself and hope the issue resolves on its own. Except… it rarely does.

People pleasing also comes from fear of disappointing others. You care deeply about your team, and you want them to feel supported, connected, and fulfilled in their roles. But when that care turns into over-functioning, you end up over-giving while your own needs slip to the bottom of the list. Empathy is a beautiful strength — but without boundaries, it leads to depletion, guilt-based decisions, and eventually burnout.

And finally, there’s the simple human desire to be liked. Most of us want to be seen as approachable and supportive. The challenge is that likability doesn’t keep a business running. Respect does. Clarity does. Consistency does. When your team sees you clearly leading — not rescuing, not over-accommodating, not softening every boundary — they feel safer, not less supported.

The Hidden Costs of People-Pleasing Leadership

People pleasing might feel like the smoother path in the moment, but it often creates more chaos over time. When decisions are made based on how others might feel rather than what the business needs, priorities become fuzzy. You may find yourself overworking, undercharging, or overextending to keep everyone happy.

Your team may also feel confused about expectations because they’re constantly shifting. And when boundaries aren’t clear or consistent, resentment can build on both sides: you feel taken advantage of, and they feel unsure of where the line actually is.

This is one of the toughest truths for practice owners to accept:
people pleasing doesn’t actually prevent conflict — it just delays it, amplifies it, and makes it harder to repair.

And perhaps most importantly, it slows down your growth. Your practice can only expand at the pace of your leadership. When decisions feel heavy or emotional every time, you end up stuck.

Shifting From People Pleasing to Confident Leadership

The good news? You can absolutely grow out of these patterns — and you don’t have to change your personality to do it. You don’t need to become stern, harsh, or unemotional. You can lead with empathy and boundaries. You can care deeply and enforce structure. And you can support your team without sacrificing yourself.

It starts with clarity.

1. Set boundaries that support both you and your practice

Your boundaries shape the culture of your business. That includes how you want your team to communicate with you, when you’re available, what decisions you consult them on, and what expectations are non-negotiable. When you model steady, healthy boundaries, your team feels safer and more grounded because they know where you stand.

2. Talk about money upfront — and without guilt

Money is one of the quickest places where people pleasing shows up. Whether it’s setting therapist splits, adjusting pay structures, revisiting fees, or making financial decisions for the team — fear often leads to undercharging or over-accommodating. Being transparent about money, and holding firm to what keeps your practice healthy, is part of responsible leadership. It protects your long-term stability and prevents resentment from building.

3. Say no with calm confidence

Here’s the first section where we’ll use bullet points — because clarity really matters here:

• You don’t owe long explanations or apologies when a decision is final.

• A simple, warm, confident “no” is more respectful than a hesitant “yes.”

• Saying no helps your team understand expectations and prevents unhealthy patterns from forming.

• The more you practise, the easier it becomes — discomfort is normal, but temporary.

4. Lead with presence, not appeasement

Confident leadership isn’t about being the “nice boss” — it’s about being steady, engaged, and clear. Pay attention to both the spoken and unspoken cues from your team. Take the time to check in, ask questions, and listen deeply. Encourage honesty, even when it’s hard. Likability fades, but trust grows when your team knows you can handle direct conversations without shutting down or backing away.

What Stronger Leadership Actually Looks Like

Here’s the second section I’ll keep in bullet points — it’s a clean way to highlight the contrast:

• You don’t avoid hard conversations; you approach them with clarity and compassion.

• You make decisions based on your vision — not on your fear of disappointing someone.

• You hold your team accountable in a supportive, consistent way.

• You prioritize what’s sustainable for the practice, not just what’s easiest in the moment.

• You invest in your own development so you can show up with confidence instead of self-doubt.

This kind of leadership doesn’t just protect you — it protects your team. Structure, accountability, and clarity give them space to grow, take responsibility, and trust the stability of the practice.

A Leadership Challenge for the Week Ahead

Choose one small step this week that moves you away from people pleasing and closer to confident leadership.
Maybe it’s saying no to something small.
Maybe it’s reinforcing a boundary you’ve let slide.
Maybe it’s adjusting a policy that has never really aligned with your values or numbers.
Or maybe it’s simply making a decision without crowdsourcing input first.

Leadership isn’t built through massive overhauls — it’s built through small, steady choices that reinforce who you’re becoming.

If you would like support moving from people pleasing to confident leadership, book your coaching session today. Let’s move you and your business forward.

Some information for this article has been gleaned from:

https://www.kimkimballcoaching.com/blog/stop-people-pleasing-sensitive-entrepreneur

https://medium.com/design-domination/stop-people-pleasing-save-your-business-365454c321e9